Dear College Park Hard Times waitress,
It was not lost on me that you had a good laugh at my expense yesterday. When you asked me what name I would like to use for the table reservation, I innocently enough told you, “eagle”, just then I noticed a smirk on your face as you demanded that I repeat myself so others can hear also. I of course obliged and yelled “Eagle!” There were a few college kids behind me and I am sure they enjoyed it also.
By now I had realized it was a folly to use that name but being the awesome guy that I am I stuck with it, and told you I wanted a table for 4. I was OK with that because it wasn’t the first time I somehow unkowningly made myself the subject of an ongoing joke.
But YOU violated the waitress/winger trust when you came out to where I was waiting and announced to everyone that “table for 4 for EAGLE was ready”. Again you had that damn smirk on your face, I knew it was pointless to convince you that eagle is in fact an awesome name and not that humorous. I gave you the “you bitch!” stare as I begrudgingly followed you to my table.
Perhaps I was a bit agitated because I was hungry, but after the wings came out and my hunger satisifed, eagle wasn’t so agitated anymore.
Next time I shall use my other alias, table for 4 please, yes put it under Horatio. Damn that’s an awesome name! HORATIO!!!