I say NO to fist bump

I am making a stand here and now. I realize that fist bumps are the cool things to do now but there’s a fine line between coolness and just overdoing it.  Lets just say I have this coworker whose idea of morning greeting is to prance around the office fist bumping whoever he comes in contact with regardless of whatever they might be doing.

NO!

Its bad enough that I have to drag myself to work at 7:00AM The LAST thing I want to do is bump the fist of some dude who get in an HOUR later and then having the nerve to prance around with his coffee mug throwing it in everybody’s face that he got an extra hour of sleep while the rest of us chums had to be here so early.

Maybe I am just overeacting out of spite but I am saying no to morning fist bumps from now on.  The next time he comes to my cubicle expecting a fist bump dude is in for a surprise. NO MUTHER@$@%@$ How about I bump ur face with my fist ? @%)&)*@#%$@#$

Filed under: I am getting older, Keen observations of the mundane , especially in the morning, no to fist bump

Dear Hard Times waitress

Dear College Park Hard Times waitress,

It was not lost on me that you had a good laugh at my expense yesterday. When you asked me what name I would like to use for the table reservation,  I innocently enough told you, “eagle”, just then I noticed a smirk on your face as you demanded that I repeat myself so others can hear also. I of course obliged and yelled “Eagle!” There were a few college kids behind me and I am sure they enjoyed it also.

By now I had realized it was a folly to use that name but being the awesome guy that I am I stuck with it, and  told you I wanted a table for 4. I was OK with that because it wasn’t the first time I somehow  unkowningly made myself the subject of an ongoing joke.

But YOU violated the waitress/winger trust when you came out to where I was waiting and announced to everyone that “table for 4 for EAGLE was ready”. Again you had that damn smirk on your face, I knew it was pointless to convince you that eagle is in fact an awesome name and not that humorous. I gave you the “you bitch!” stare as I begrudgingly followed you to my table. 

Perhaps I was a bit agitated because I was hungry, but after the wings came out and my hunger satisifed, eagle wasn’t so agitated anymore.   

Next time I shall use my other alias, table for 4 please, yes put it under Horatio. Damn that’s an awesome name! HORATIO!!!

Best damn wings place around Laurel

Filed under: I am getting older , eagle, hard times, horatio, wings